Good Hotel Guide
Hostels and Hotels in Dumfries
All B&Bs, Hostel and Hotels welcome to list their property here – one of these areas then please contact us to list your hotel below, free of charge.
Annan, Canonbie, Castle Douglas, Dalbeattie, Dg, Dumfries, Gretna, Kirkcudbright, Langholm, Lockerbie, Moffat, Newton Stewart, Sanquhar, Stranraer, Thornhill
For UK travelers going abroad, we recommend Tenerife, with feel of the UK yet all the sun of Tenerife. Read an extract below from More Ketchup than Salsa, the story of a English couple who left the UK to set up life in Tenerife. Info on how to buy the book can be found below.
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Below you will find short extracts from More ketchup than Salsa by Joe Cawley – not to be missed.
Short Extract
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Kevin and Brian, the two representatives for the British timeshare line, had approached us about hosting their welcome party at the Smugglers instead of the Altamira Hotel lounge. Some of the more pretentious residents of the hotel associated timeshare with con-artists and had made a point of hissing their opinions while walking past on the way to the pool: ‘Dont do it, ‘Its a scam, ‘Just say no. Naturally, this made the two reps tasks of extracting large deposits all the harder. Another reason why they thought it better to use our bar was that it meant free drinks for themselves the single most important reason for doing anything amongst the British expat community. In return for us providing free jugs of sangria and a smattering of peanuts, Kevin and Brian would extol the virtues of the Smugglers Tavern to weekly groups of around twenty to thirty new arrivals. More often than not, several of the timeshare fly-buys would stay after the welcome meeting and order food, enabling us to recoup the cost of our meagre giveaways and showcase our hospitality talents at the same time. However, this extra crowd of customers was in addition to our regular breakfast trade, and once or twice whoever happened to be on shift that morning would be faced with 30 full English breakfasts and 30 coffee orders all at the same time. Understandably, the bar was not looking its best when David and Faith walked in that afternoon. Theres no fizzy water or bottled beer in the fridge, said Faith during her habitual inspection. This had become a ritual of Faiths in another effort to prove to herself that she still retained some authority, and she was always pleased to discover some slight failure in our duties. Dont start, Faith, warned Joy. ‘Weve done 65 meals this afternoon as well as hosting the timeshare meeting. Ive not got round to stocking the bar yet.
Annan, Canonbie, Castle Douglas, Dalbeattie, Dg, Dumfries, Gretna, Kirkcudbright, Langholm, Lockerbie, Moffat, Newton Stewart, Sanquhar, Stranraer, Thornhill
I work Hotel Conquistador. I clean room, make bed. John One had come into the bar and headed straight for the girl. ‘You can make my bed any day, love, he said, putting his arm round her shoulders. She pulled away from him, eyes wide in horror. Even John was surprised at the reaction and raised his palms to apologise. Did you come to Tenerife by yourself? continued Joy. No. I come with boyfriend but now I have big trouble. Her head lowered even more.
Fortunately one of the very few culinary skills that we had imported between us was Joys knack for baking apple pies. The Smugglers had recently gained a reputation for its exceedingly good cakes, apple in particular. Holidaymakers with all the time in the world to chat (but a disproportionate lack of subjects to chat about) would bask around the pool and make plans for their next meal, which would invariably include the famous Smugglers Tavern apple pie. Sunlounger word of mouth marketing was so efficient that by mid-morning we would receive a procession of people popping their heads into the kitchen to reserve a slab of Joys speciality. No matter how many we made, the majority of slices had already been claimed by the time the evening meals started. By now our meal count averaged around 40-50 breakfasts and lunches combined, and 100-120 evening meals. Naturally we had had to increase our efficiency to turn around more tables, but it was no mean feat in the searing July heat. All the more draining as we now provided entertainment in the evening. We needed help. We knew it was going to be almost impossible to find anybody that could cook and that would endure the heat and pace of the kitchen for the paltry wages we were offering. The biggest help that we could hope for would be a couple that could come in after all the food had been served, clean up, and run the bar until closing time. This would at least put an end to some of the 3a.m. and 4a.m. bedtimes that we were suffering now it was summer.